Seventeen weeks pregnant, and my sleeping is horrendous. I wake up every two hours to pee. And the smallest peep of a snore from the big bear who sleeps next to me wakes me up and sometimes tempts me to kick him. Instead, I urge him to "roll over on your tummy." It only stops the snoring momentarily, but sometimes in those few moments, I can fall back asleep Most, I cannot. So I move to our office, where the spare bed resides, and I try to catch some rest there instead. Sometimes the transition is easy and I'm able to fall back asleep. Sometimes I'm wide awake and spend time tinkering on the computer. There's only so much facebooking you can do, so I read blogs to pass the time. I follow one of my best friends, and then I read this and this. Most of the blogs I follow are light-hearted, simple reads, and I generally am not interested in religious blogs. Not that there's anything wrong with them. They're just not my cup of tea. I recently stumbled up the blog, A Holy Experience, and I found the following, making me glad that there are religious bloggers out there. :-) I think this is beautiful.
Dear Babies that I have bore:
You teach your Mama and she be slow.
Every day we throw back the quilts and we do life together all day in these four walls and you six children teach this one hard heart what it means to love.
For learning your Mama --- what it means to show grace, to step over negativity, to bite the tongue, to hold and soothe the sadness, to work on when tired, to pray more fervently, to wipe up the ugliness with love, to cover up the sinnning mad with the embrace tender, to learn to do love the only way love is real: unconditionally.
It isn't always pretty. Every single day, many times a day, I fail.
But Love doesn't. Every way of living, every paradigm, every philosophy, every thing, that attempts to function apart from the righted love will unequivocally fail.
There is only one sustainable, enduring force to be found in the whole of the cosmos and it is sacrifical love.
Today again you children will teach me the language of the Kingdom that will never pass away, and today again I'll learn love, the reality that will never pass away and together we will work on rightly ordering love and I don't know if I ever really would have known it in the skin and the bone, the awe of the sacrifical love, without the love of each of you.
Labels: pregnancy. mamahood
for breaking into Greta's Easter basket (which I prepared two weeks ago) and stealing some chocolate candy. I'm not usually a chocolate fanatic, but I needed something sweet.
Will blog soon.
Currently in pregnancy-induced hibernation.