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02.06.10

Here's Greta, trying to dress herself in her piggy pjs

even though she is already dressed in pjs.

That's her thing these days: dressing herself. In mama's undies. In Daddy's boxers.

Shirts as skirts. And SHOES! Anyone's shoes are HERS.

You try to help her get dressed, and she gets PISSED OFF.

How dare you.

In efforts to curb and manage these frequent situations,

we've been reading lots of articles and info on toddlerhood.

I remember as a new parent, I'd hear jokes of,

"Oh, don't you wish babies came with a manual?" And at the time, I did.

But we sailed those seas way quicker than I'd ever imagined possible,

and here we are in unchartered territory.

The time for a manual is NOW.

Toddlerhood with Greta is like this:

One moment you're laying on the beach, soaking in the sun,

enjoying a tasty pina colada and listening to the waves crash.

Everything is perfect.

The next moment, the pina colada IS NOT THE DRINK TO HAVE,

and the SUN IS STUPID, MAKE IT STOP SHINING NOW,

and the water, which is 20 feet away IS IN THE WAY. NOW. MAKE IT GO AWAY.

You can offer a new drink, seek shelter from the sun beneath an umbrella.

You can try to move further from the water.

None of it works.

And you have no idea WHAT would work.

Because you don't speak the language of toddler.