How to Piss Off a Pregnant Woman

How to Piss Off a Pregnant Woman:

• say to her, "Well, I can definitely tell that those pregnancy hormones are kicking in," in response to her expressing any sort of emotion;
• continuously inqure as to the location of your boxer shorts even though you've been informed that said pregnant woman is no longer on full-time laundry duty;
• whine about how your feet are sooooo cold from having to walk the house barefoot because all your socks are in the dirty laundry;
• sigh dramatically (again and again) about having to baby-proof the large television that could possibly fall on resident toddler;
• refuse to sleep on the new bedding because the duvet consists of flowery fabric;
• say, "I diagree with what you're saying," and then, seconds later ask, "What are we disagreeing about?";
• not deeming it a priority or acknowledging the significance of putting up the glass bottles of liquor out of reach from curious, cabinet-latch-breaking baby girl;
• ask pregnant wife if she's going to clean YOUR bathroom before company comes over;
• forget that pregnant wife is supposed to be resting and taking it easy even after having situation explained to you repeatedly on multiple occasions;
• open your mouth (if you are above-described person);
• breathe her air (if you are above-described person); or
• look at her wrong (if you are above-described person).

This is just today's list. I'm sure I can come up with another tomorrow.